Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Jonestown...If I had gone down...

I came in early this morning to check my e-mail and the like, and was reminded when msn came up that today is the anniversary of Jonestown... that is another of my 'almosts'... or 'if I had done x instead of y's'...

I moved to Berkeley in the fall of 1976, and fell in love with everything... I loved the freedom, I was in a community house, with about 20 other folk (depending on the month) and I felt like I was doing something for the community rather than being a leach... within the 1st 2 weeks of my moving there, I had 5 jobs, working as a home health aide, and yea... it was good...

I had heard stuff about the community that was being built in Guyana, and had debated with myself about going down... and even had someone who was wanting to give me a ticket down... but that little voice that we all have kept saying wait... wait... it isn't right...

If I had gone down...

(this is a conversation that I had with a friend of mine this morning... )

[07:40] auntie_pita: we were talking the other day about things that 'wouldn't be'... jonestown was 30 years ago... thats another of my 'almost' but didn't feel right...

[07:41] g___: what do you mean another of your almost?

[07:41] g___: you were supposed to be there?

[07:41] auntie_pita: yep... had a person who was willing to put up the airfare for me to go down... that little voice in the back of the head said... ummmm better wait...

[07:41] auntie_pita: went to berkeley instead

[07:42] g___: remind me to thank that little voice one day.

[07:42] g___r: sounds like one hell of a blog. if tribe comes back up.. you should do it.

[07:42] auntie_pita: honey i thank her every day for all the things that have happened because i'm here in so cal... and didn't happen...

[07:43] auntie_pita: thats another of those where not just my life was affected, but megs too!
[07:43] auntie_pita: another of... no dougie - no meg...

[07:44] g___: yay for meg

[07:44] auntie_pita: yea! she was supposed to be here...

[07:47] g___: but?

[07:50] auntie_pita: no but... just thinking about my health i had 4 miscarriages before i had her... didn't want kids... so no biggie... found out i was going to have her... she was a high risk preg. i have asthma, and am rh A/du- her dad is rh A+... she's supposed to be here... maybe i needed anchoring... maybe she needed to be anchored...

[07:50] auntie_pita: maybe both :-)

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Spinner of fiber, Knitter, Crocheter, Re-enactor